How to truly enjoy the end of the year festivities without depleting yourself.
The coming holiday season stresses out a lot of people. Many of my clients feel out of balance between all obligations and tensions that come with big family gatherings. Often, they feel the need to fake their own state of mind or emotions and impress upon others. They can’t be authentic with themselves and get overwhelmed by the stress and conflict that these coming festivities cause.
Spiritually, the end of the year holidays are all about joy, peace and gratitude for what has been in the past year, what is now and what will be in the New Year to come. Many people forget to set their intention on what they really want to live and experience during this festive season. We are so busy buying expensive food, presents and clothes that we miss out on the essentials.
John C. Maxwell calls it intentional living and Deepak Chopra speaks about giving real meaning to your experience by guiding your intention and attention.
“Tell me to what you pay attention and I will tell you who you are.” Jose Ortega y Gasset
What exactly do you intend to focus on in this coming month?
5 tips on how to be authentic with yourself during the holiday season.
1. Stay centered and take time to set your specific daily intention.
“The best way to insure you achieve the greatest satisfaction out of life is to behave intentionally.” Deborah Day
By practicing meditation and abdominal breathing, you can feel for yourself which intention you want to set for the day. And where you are going to put your attention when gathering around the tree with your close family and friends.
Are you going to focus on absence and lack of things or on abundance? Will you spread words of love and connection or words of jealousy and doubt?
Are you going to be reactive in your responses or staying calm and centered?
This is your choice and your choice only, choose wisely.
2. Stay away from toxic talk or people.
“Let go of people who dull your shine, spoil your spirit and bring you drama. Cancel your subscription to their issues.” Steve Maraboli
We all know them and still we often engage with them in long conversations, although it depletes us. People who gossip and criticize others, who have negative discussions that have no meaning and who wallow in their never-ending drama.
Do not join in and keep your distance.
3. Stay with your internal and external boundaries.
“Your personal boundaries protect the inner core of your identity and your right to choices.” Gerard Manly Hopkins
Do not let other people ignore or change your own boundaries. You have the right to set your limits and protect yourself. Boundaries are set clearly and firmly to ask for respect and to respect yourself along the way.
Use your physical, mental and emotional boundaries as well as your energy and time limits. It is up to you to decide how you practice your conscious self-care. Let nobody tell you otherwise.
4. Stay emphatic instead of proving your right.
“True contentment comes with empathy.” Tim Finn
With family members, we often go into old habits of heavy discussions of the past in which we want to “get even” and prove our right and “their wrong.”
Why not stay calm and listen with an emphatic ear to find out their true feelings and needs. You do not have to overpower anybody to stay authentic in your power. Just listen. You got two ears and one mouth for a reason.
5. Stay in the moment and enjoy, again and again.
“If we are not fully ourselves in the present moment, we miss everything.” Thich Naht Hanh
Take it easy on yourself, leave out all the “should” and “don’t”. Just relax and enjoy every minute of this coming season because it will be gone before you know it and life will never be the same again.
These 5 tips to be authentic with yourself can be extended to your normal daily life if you want to. You can live your life as if every day is a holy day.
“Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you have for sure.” Oprah Winfrey
Wishing you all a fulfilling Holiday Season!
If you want to learn more about these concepts of conscious self-care and growth, then please go and register for my free online training where I explain how to thrive without sacrificing yourself and your well-being.