How to stop feeling hurt and frustrated due to relationship mistakes.

There is an abundance of articles, books and quotes about relationships and how we can make them work. Still, it seems to be one of the most challenging things for us in our lives.

The purpose of a relationship with another being is to love, be loved and feel connected. But so often, we are feeling deeply unfulfilled. Many of my clients come in with a lot of complaints about their relationships with their surroundings, feeling hurt and frustrated!

What most of us do not realize is that we are making 2 major relationship mistakes on an unconscious level. We do not even realize that we make them, it all happens through our conditioning.

  1. We look outside of ourselves to find the cause of the conflict.

This means that most of us are judging our surroundings on a consistent level. We see the outside world, people or things as the cause of how we feel. We look outside of us to find the cause and the solution to our conflicts or challenges.

Look at your romantic relationship with your partner where you are used to judge that person for making you feel hurt or frustrated. Now change that situation and go within to observe yourself on a conscious level. Ask yourself the right questions to what exact need lies behind those feelings because that is then the underlying cause of your hurt and frustration. Try to understand yourself better and search for strategies or requests to fulfil those core needs. It will definitely change that romantic relationship or any other relationship for that matter because you are focussing on yourself and not on the judgement of the other person.


  1. We forget that the number one relationship in our lives is the one with ourselves.

We are conditioned from a young age that putting others first is the right thing to do, that we need to live our lives through the outside world.

What we do not realize is, that every relationship in your life mirrors the relationship with yourself. If you want others to love, understand and respect you, you need to learn to love, understand and respect yourself first before you can expect it from others.

Many of us women (and also some men) sacrifice ourselves to please, help and save others in our surroundings, personally or professionally. We forget that we need to fill our own cup first so that we can build relationships with others from a place of self-love, self-acceptance and self-worth. If you do not value yourself, how can you expect from your partner, your boss or your mother-in-law to value you?

These two relationship mistakes are to tell you that it all starts with you. You are your best investment is one of my mantras, and I want to inspire you to live from the inside out. I hope you can see that it all starts with yourself so that you can take control of your life and your results.

Let’s stop pointing fingers at others for the results in our life. Stop making the mistakes of looking outside of you for your relationship challenges. Take your life and your relationships in your own hands. Make the decision that you are going to be your next project! You will not regret it!

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